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Drabble: Uncle Eames, Where Do Babies Come From? (Arthur/Eames)
Title: Where Do Babies Come From, Uncle Eames?
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
sarahyyy
Rating: PG
Character/Pairing: Arthur/Eames, Phillipa, James
Word Count: 567
Disclaimer: I do not, in any way, own anything.
A/N: Filled this prompt of Phillipa and James asking Arthur and Eames where babies come from over at![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
inception_kink. Check Round 11 out and fill some prompts! =D
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Eames likes to consider himself a conversationalist skilled enough to be able to avoid all topics of conversation that he deems as uncomfortable which makes no sense that he is trapped in Phillipa’s room with no way out and no one to save him because Arthur decided that tonight would be a good time to bake gingerbread cookies.
The two Cobb children are looking up at him with wide eyes, anticipating his reply.
“I-” Eames clears his throat, his eyes darting around the room, searching for hidden passageways because knowing Cobb and his highly eccentric ways, there’s bound to be one of those hanging around, isn’t there? “Um, pardon?”
Phillipa, absolutely undeterred, repeats her question. “Where do babies come from, Uncle Eames?”
“Um,” Eames tries to stall for time, just in case Arthur decides to come upstairs to save the day.
Arthur doesn’t.
And the gleam in Phillipa’s eyes is growing dangerous. “Uncle Eames?” she prompts.
“This is,” Eames clears his throat, “very um, difficult science. And I have never been good at science. I’ve always been absolutely rotten at it, really. You should probably ask someone else. Your Uncle Yusuf and Aunt Ariadne when they come round tomorrow, maybe?”
“Can you at least try, Uncle Eames?” James cuts in and asks in this hopeful voice and Phillipa nods vehemently at that.
“Well,” Eames tries to inch slowly to where his phone was sitting on Phillipa’s bed before he decides that it is a lost cause. “When two people love each other very much…”
Eames begins, thus.
--
Hours later finds Eames, Phillipa and James in the kitchen, waiting to sample Arthur’s cookies.
Eames smiles when he sees Arthur break of the edges of his cookies before popping them into Phillipa and James’ mouths.
“More, Uncle Arthur, I want more!” James says impatiently after he’s swallowed his bite.
“You’ll get a bigger piece when they cool,” Arthur promises.
Eames pouts at Arthur. “Where’s mine, darling?”
Arthur rolls his eyes and pops half a gingerbread man into Eames’ mouth. “Sometimes, Eames, I doubt your maturity,” Arthur says, but his lips twitch up in a smile.
Eames has almost erased the whole terrifying incident with Phillipa and James from his memory when Phillipa suddenly squeals excitedly.
“Are you going to have a baby?” Phillipa asks Eames animatedly, clapping her hands together in apparent glee.
Eames blanches and almost chokes on his cookie.
Arthur’s eyebrows rise. “Why would you think so, Pippa?”
Phillipa frowns and turns to Arthur. “You love Uncle Eames, right?” she asks.
Eames groans.
Arthur, for his part, smiles and nods. “Who doesn’t?”
Phillipa grins. “And you just put a very long piece of cookie into his mouth,” she continues, “So now Uncle Eames is going to have a baby. Can you have a baby girl? Then she can be my best friend!”
Eames hits his head against the wall repeatedly.
Arthur frowns. “I’m not sure I get you, Pippa.”
Phillipa lets out a groan. “Uncle Eames said,” she starts impatiently, “that when two people love each other very much, just like you both do, someone will put something long into the other someone’s hole and then they will have a baby!”
There is a moment of silence in which Eames considers digging a hole, climbing into it and never coming out again.
Arthur snorts a laugh before turning to Eames. “You are never speaking to them alone again.”
Author:
sarahyyy Rating: PG
Character/Pairing: Arthur/Eames, Phillipa, James
Word Count: 567
Disclaimer: I do not, in any way, own anything.
A/N: Filled this prompt of Phillipa and James asking Arthur and Eames where babies come from over at
inception_kink. Check Round 11 out and fill some prompts! =D---------------------------------
Eames likes to consider himself a conversationalist skilled enough to be able to avoid all topics of conversation that he deems as uncomfortable which makes no sense that he is trapped in Phillipa’s room with no way out and no one to save him because Arthur decided that tonight would be a good time to bake gingerbread cookies.
The two Cobb children are looking up at him with wide eyes, anticipating his reply.
“I-” Eames clears his throat, his eyes darting around the room, searching for hidden passageways because knowing Cobb and his highly eccentric ways, there’s bound to be one of those hanging around, isn’t there? “Um, pardon?”
Phillipa, absolutely undeterred, repeats her question. “Where do babies come from, Uncle Eames?”
“Um,” Eames tries to stall for time, just in case Arthur decides to come upstairs to save the day.
Arthur doesn’t.
And the gleam in Phillipa’s eyes is growing dangerous. “Uncle Eames?” she prompts.
“This is,” Eames clears his throat, “very um, difficult science. And I have never been good at science. I’ve always been absolutely rotten at it, really. You should probably ask someone else. Your Uncle Yusuf and Aunt Ariadne when they come round tomorrow, maybe?”
“Can you at least try, Uncle Eames?” James cuts in and asks in this hopeful voice and Phillipa nods vehemently at that.
“Well,” Eames tries to inch slowly to where his phone was sitting on Phillipa’s bed before he decides that it is a lost cause. “When two people love each other very much…”
Eames begins, thus.
--
Hours later finds Eames, Phillipa and James in the kitchen, waiting to sample Arthur’s cookies.
Eames smiles when he sees Arthur break of the edges of his cookies before popping them into Phillipa and James’ mouths.
“More, Uncle Arthur, I want more!” James says impatiently after he’s swallowed his bite.
“You’ll get a bigger piece when they cool,” Arthur promises.
Eames pouts at Arthur. “Where’s mine, darling?”
Arthur rolls his eyes and pops half a gingerbread man into Eames’ mouth. “Sometimes, Eames, I doubt your maturity,” Arthur says, but his lips twitch up in a smile.
Eames has almost erased the whole terrifying incident with Phillipa and James from his memory when Phillipa suddenly squeals excitedly.
“Are you going to have a baby?” Phillipa asks Eames animatedly, clapping her hands together in apparent glee.
Eames blanches and almost chokes on his cookie.
Arthur’s eyebrows rise. “Why would you think so, Pippa?”
Phillipa frowns and turns to Arthur. “You love Uncle Eames, right?” she asks.
Eames groans.
Arthur, for his part, smiles and nods. “Who doesn’t?”
Phillipa grins. “And you just put a very long piece of cookie into his mouth,” she continues, “So now Uncle Eames is going to have a baby. Can you have a baby girl? Then she can be my best friend!”
Eames hits his head against the wall repeatedly.
Arthur frowns. “I’m not sure I get you, Pippa.”
Phillipa lets out a groan. “Uncle Eames said,” she starts impatiently, “that when two people love each other very much, just like you both do, someone will put something long into the other someone’s hole and then they will have a baby!”
There is a moment of silence in which Eames considers digging a hole, climbing into it and never coming out again.
Arthur snorts a laugh before turning to Eames. “You are never speaking to them alone again.”
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I started laughing like I was crazy (maybe I am, oh, well).
Eames as a erm... teacher is so funny. And Arthur making cookies - aww, that's so cute. Really lovely fic ^^
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I'm glad you enjoyed the story!
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<3
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Oh my gosh, adorable. I love it.
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(Icon love! =D)
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Oh God, this was pure gold. I'm joining those who nearly choked, btw. ♥
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I can imagine this happening..either this or Eames showing his prowess and how he would impregnate someone.
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That part was amazing, but not even as half as LOLtastic as the end. I am seriously still laughing, and I'm glad I'm home alone, because otherwise, there'd be some 'splainin' to do. ;D
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::dies::
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*loves*
I'm glad you liked it, bb. =D
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I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thank you!